A Unitarian Universalist friend and I were talking about class tensions in church, and he said that he found Water Communion hard to bear because it was so much about the places people had gone on their summer vacations.
Oh yeah. I’ve been to some Water Communions that felt that way too. It is so easy for our ingathering ceremony, in which people bring water and pour it into a communal bowl, to turn into a “what I did on my summer vacation” recitation, which can make the ritual obliviously exclusive of those who don’t have summer homes, or summer vacations, or the money for airfare, or the luxury to stop working for even one week out of the year. What a shame; it’s so opposite of what the Water Communion can be.
The core symbolism of the Water Communion is that we all come from water: as a species on a planet where life began in the ocean, as mammals who float in amniotic fluid as we are readied for birth, as beings whose cells are mostly water. And yet we are separate from each other, and we have been apart–since there tends to be a slowing-down, a different rhythm in the summer months, even in churches that have services and religious education right on through the summer–and now we are reuniting. We are separate and together, the way water scatters into rain and streams and clouds and springs and ponds and puddles and yet flows together again and again, one great planetary ocean. Not only is no drop of water superior to any other; all water comes from the same place.
So the class issue is only a part of what’s awry with the “where I went this summer” approach to the ritual. Even if everyone in the world had a summer home in Provence, “This water comes from our summer home in Provence” would not be what I wanted this ceremony to be about. It’s so trivial, whereas “We are separate beings and yet all one” is one of the profoundest truths we try to encompass.
I’ve deliberately shaped our Water Communion at the Unitarian Universalist Church of Palo Alto (UUCPA) with these concerns in mind, and that conversation with my friend made me realize that other UUs could learn from that process, so I’m going to share it here. I’d also like to learn from readers: judging by this description, or by your experience of UUCPA’s Water Communion if you’ve been there, have we succeeded? And what do you do in your congregation to keep our attention focused on the deepest meanings of the Water Communion?
Here are some dos and don’ts that have guided me.
Don’t: have an open mike where everyone describes where the water came from. Not only is this impractical for any but the smallest congregations, but it just about orders people to say “We brought this from the Mediterranean, where we went on a beautiful cruise.”
Do: provide a way for people to share the significance of the water they’ve brought, and have a leader or leaders share a precis. Doing this has allowed me to rephrase people’s descriptions in a way that honors the most important aspects, while playing down the others. So, for example, if someone writes, “This water comes from our family’s summer home on Cape Cod, where I’ve gone since I was a small child visiting my grandparents–this year I was there with my grandchildren,” I might share, “Water from the Atlantic Ocean,” or “Water from a place made sacred by five generations of one family,” or “Water from a multigenerational family gathering,” or some combination of those.
Do: frequently model modest origins for your own water. I usually bring mine from my home tap, even if I’ve been somewhere exotic. (In the spirit of full disclosure, one reason is that when I do travel, I always forget to bring back a little bottleful . . . !)
Do: make reference to the water’s many sources. At UUCPA, we have banners that artistically express the four directions and elements; sometimes we use those in this service and people pour their water into a bowl under one of the banners. They can have a time of meditation to think about where their water comes from, symbolically or literally, and choose the direction/element accordingly. Jane Altman Page wrote nice words to accompany something like that here, on the Worship Web.
Don’t: just pour the water down the drain. While keeping it in the water cycle, that doesn’t honor the sacredness of the ritual. People are bringing something of themselves when they bring that “water from a special day at the beach” or “tap water from my great-grandfather’s house,” so it’s important to let them know that it will be treated with due reverence.
Do: do something important with the water. For example, carry it out ceremoniously after the service and water a special tree. . . . Bless it and invite everyone to put it on their foreheads / hands / feet / hearts. . . . We save some of ours for dedications throughout the year, and pour some in from last year’s dedication water so that the water is now gathered from many years of rituals (does anyone else do this? I don’t even remember if I came up with that idea, or inherited it on arriving in Palo Alto). I usually pour the rest out on our grounds with some words of thanks and praise. (A comment by a church member just reminded me of another possibility: invite people to bring some of the mingled water home, the way we do with the flowers at Flower Sunday, and encourage them to mindfully use it, e.g., to water a plant.)
Do: frame the ritual in terms of its larger meanings. There are so many. Our Minister of Religious Education, Dan Harper, has done a wonderful, geeky demonstration of just how many molecules of water we’re talking about, and how big a number that is. (Remember, we’re serving in Silicon Valley. When you ask, “Are there any geeks here who can come hold this paper for me?,” many hands shoot up.) He uses that to prove our literal interdependence. The year Water Communion was preceded by Hurricane Katrina, we had to talk about the destructive power of water, and that was a chance to go into some theological depth.
And, if you’re reminding folks about Water Communion now, as summer starts, don’t emphasize that they should bring their water back from special travels. There’s no need to mention travel at all. This year, my reminder in the newsletter said “We bring water from the places of our lives.”
I’d love to hear what others do.
35 comments
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June 14, 2013 at 9:48 am
Lee Richards
In one congregation I served we autoclaved a portion of the collected water in order to purify it, then used it for child dedications throughout the year. Some of this was always retained to use as “starter” for the following year’s ceremony, providing an ongoing continuity from one year to the next.
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June 14, 2013 at 10:25 am
kingstboy
Thank you for this opportunity to comment. As a cleric of 20 years experience, I have made explicit efforts to remove the summer vacation one-upsmanship aspect of this. Many who have no summer cottage or take no cruise, who work all summer out of necessity, are reluctant to criticize this for fear of appearing surly and resentful, so they keep quiet while all of the special experiences are shared. In addition to explicitly framing a broader understanding of this, similar to the approach above, I have also provided little paper cut out water drops people can use, and have encouraged these also to symbolize the need for water justice, for example.
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June 14, 2013 at 10:27 am
tatwood2005
Thank you, Amy, for this thoughtful deconstruction of water communion and ritual. It can be difficult for us to enter that state of consciousness where the potential impact on others of the things we say becomes clear. I think that you’ve contributed an important reflection on the role of “intent and impact” in congregational life and in our rituals. It brings home (in the kindest terms) some core insights that UUs strive for, yet often miss the mark: that most people in our culture lead very different lives than professionals do. I think it’s possible to learn even more by spending time with people from different classes, faiths, cultures, and levels of educational achievement. When we share meals together and listen deeply to one another’s stories, we also encounter the shared humanity hiding in plain sight behind these socially-constructed boundaries. Thank you for these evocative explorations of the breakthrough questions of 21st-century Unitarian Universalism.
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September 7, 2016 at 11:40 am
Peggy Walton
I had the good fortune to be at a church other than my home church for Water Communion. I was surprised that the minister did not provide a mic and asked everyone to participate in silence. I thought it had more to do with not allowing the ceremony to drag on endlessly, but she may have had this in mind and I love how thoughtful UU’s can be. Yes, I now see how this service could be a form of exclusion and elitist. Thank you!
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June 14, 2013 at 11:51 am
Amy Zucker Morgenstern
Lee, that’s a higher-tech version of what we do: sterilize the water, use it throughout the year for dedications, pour a little into the bowl during the ritual to symbolize our connection with previous years. After ten years here, I’m increasingly aware that some of our water was shared by people who are now no longer living. It makes it very poignant and precious. So glad to hear that another UU congregation does this too!
kingstboy, I love the paper cutouts, and the connection to justice issues.
I should have said, we also always have water for those who didn’t bring any, just as we have lots of extra flowers for those who didn’t bring any to Flower Communion. There are always newcomers, or people who forgot.
tatwood2005, “It’s possible to learn even more by spending time with people from different classes, faiths, cultures, and levels of educational achievement. When we share meals together and listen deeply to one another’s stories, we also encounter the shared humanity hiding in plain sight behind these socially-constructed boundaries”–hear, hear!
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June 14, 2013 at 2:33 pm
Carol Steinfeld
We conducted a water communion at the finale of a water-topic conference I co-organized in 2003 (www.ecological-engineering.org). It was at 9 a.m. on a Sunday morning. I couldn’t believe how many of our U.S. and international attendees showed up with their water. The collected water was taken home by a local attendee to irrigate his apple tree.
This was/is the most memorable aspect of that conference for several attendees. Nice! –AZM
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June 22, 2013 at 10:35 pm
angolathree
A key thing that maybe isn’t always used is the environmental state of the water. If it comes from the tap- is it clean now? will it in the future? will that river be clean- what threatens it?
Ultimately more important than location is quality and quantity. How many more water communions can that source provide for? All excellent points of reflection for a Water Communion service. Thank you. –AZM
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August 3, 2014 at 8:56 am
Geri Kennedy
The original Water Ritual was created by Carolyn McDade and Lucille Longview at the Women & Religion Continental Convocation of UU’s in East Lansing Mi in 1980. A small quote: “Celebrating now our connectedness, we choose water as our symbol of empowerment. As rivers in cycle release their waters and regain new beginnings, so do we cycle: for us as women these beginnings are powerful, but not easy. But still we come to create and to celebrate and to live by the only spirituality worthy of our devotion – a spirituality that uplifts, empowers and connects”.
I have copies of the original if anyone is interested. Geri Kennedy, UU Fellowship of Redwood City Thanks, Geri! Our religious educator, Dan Harper, tells the origin story every other year (he does a different reflection on the alternate years). He thinks it’s really important for our people to know how this ritual, and so much else in UUism, arose out of feminism, and I agree. Thanks for offering this resource–hope people take you up on it! –AZM
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August 4, 2014 at 3:01 pm
jamie
Geri, I’d love a copy. How can I get you my information? Are you on Facebook so I can pm you my email address? Jamie and anyone else, I have Geri’s e-mail address, so if you write me (parishmin AT uucpa DOT org), I’ll pass the request along. –Amy
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August 4, 2014 at 5:38 pm
Lora Powell-Haney
There is a lovely version of the origins of the water communion in the book “A Lamp In Every Corner.” I believe it is still available through the UUA Bookstore. And thank you for this thoughtful article! Sharing this kind of water communion with the children and youth in an religious education program would be so powerful.
Thanks for the resource, Lora. –Amy
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September 6, 2015 at 8:54 am
Amy Zucker Morgenstern
I’ve realized since writing the above that this is a photocopied chapter out of a book, so I would actually urge folks to reward the authors and editor by acquiring the book. It is called Sacred Dimensions of Women’s Experience, edited by Elizabeth Dodson Gray, and not hard to get via any used- or out-of-print book resource (AbeBooks, Powell’s, etc.).
http://www.elizabethdodsongray.com/books/sacred-dimensions-of-womens-experience/
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June 23, 2017 at 9:54 pm
createpeaceblog
Geri, I’d love a copy of the original! linkandbuildwithme@gmail.com
I live in Detroit. I am working to collect resources for our congregations to use specifically to tie their Water Communion more into justice issues. Water is Life ❤
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August 3, 2014 at 5:22 pm
John Barich
I would humbly add that our planet was not born with water. It came here (and still does) from distant star system. Like us, it’s just along for the ride as long as conditions permit. Oh, what a long, strange(and wonderful) trip it has been. What a beautiful addition! Thanks. –AZM
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August 4, 2014 at 5:45 am
Maureen Killoran
In one congregation I served for many years, we also kept a cumulative bottle of (sterilized) water from the communions, and each year after the service and when the “save it” portion was set aside we went to the memorial garden for a ritual of sharing the community’s gathered water with those who had gone on. I think I probably shared this in the old First Days Record – anybody remember this? I remember your contributions to FDR, but not this one. I had just been thinking that now that we have a memorial garden (new this summer), we need to incorporate it into our ritual life. Perfect. –Amy
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August 4, 2014 at 10:49 am
Kit Ketcham
I provide 3×5 cards in the pews, ask people to write down the spiritual/personal significance of their water and when they come up to pour their small amount of water into the common vessel, they leave the card in a basket on the table. After the Procession of the Waters is ended, the worship assistant and I read these aloud in a kind of litany for all to hear, with no names attached. And I always save the water, “boil the hell out of it” and bring a portion back the next year to be the “starter” for the new year. We use it during the year for child dedications and I have used it to anoint the dying to say thank you for the gifts they have brought to this life, using wording somewhat similar to the blessing I bestow on the child being dedicated. It is always a memorable, thought-provoking service and I love doing it. I also love some of the ideas other commenters have offered and the blogger who started the conversation. Thanks! Sounds very similar to how we do it, Kit. I’ve never used the water to bless the dying–how beautiful! We float into this world on water, we float out. –AZM
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August 4, 2014 at 10:54 am
Joseph Michael Mish
We share only seven words about our water- it’s comes off more spiritual and less about what we did on vacation. Lovely! All those little poems. –AZM
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August 4, 2014 at 11:43 am
Diggitt McLaughlin
What a useful piece! Thanks for it. Both my home and my internship congregations learned your exact lessons during early days of the water communion and have resolved them over the years. In favor of the universal and the shared and the much-loved.
Deplorable as those early services could be, I believe we all learned from them. All rituals evolve over time, even the most cherished.
I certainly hope so. We learn from experience. Rather than get defensive about implied or explicit criticisms of what we’ve done before, we can be grateful that (e.g.) we have more awareness than we once did about class issues. –AZM
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August 4, 2014 at 9:01 pm
Karen Cleary
Thank you so much for the article and all the comments. The Water communion was introduced to Auckland Unitarians a few years ago, by a new member from the US, who insisted that we use it every year as our first service. (We are a lay-led congregation). To the best of my recollection, this person did not explain anything about the origins of the service, & it certainly came across as a “what we did on our holidays” process with little spiritual content. We will have a new minister very soon, so I will be interested to get his take on the water service. I’m happy to say we have done the Flower Communion every spring for many years, & that does emphasise our community spirit & connection with the earth, the seasons & the universe. It sounds like for that member, it was important even though they couldn’t really articulate why. There is a lot of “why” to this practice, though, starting with the origins Geri alludes to in her comment–I hope you and the other Auckland folks find it more meaningful as you learn about it. Keep us posted! –AZM
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August 4, 2014 at 9:28 pm
Charlie Davis
I have a book that people write inas they enter the service. They put their name the source of the water and the emotion or meaning it evoked for them. At the end of service people process ur the aile and pour water wit hour speaking.
I read the places and meanings but not the names. some water is saved for next year. as well as the book.
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August 5, 2014 at 6:47 am
Linda Loesch
Mark Belletini, minister at 1st UU Columbus, Ohio invites those who have lost a loved one during the year to join him in watering the church’s memorial garden with the water from water communion. I find this very moving.
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August 6, 2014 at 12:06 pm
aelmorgan
During one of those services with everyone giving travel brags from exotic lands, I poured in my water saying it was from my trip to Wal-mart.
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August 18, 2015 at 3:56 pm
teawithbuzz
Rev. Nate Walker led us in Philadelphia to add our water with a word of what we bring to our congregation this year. Some brought hope, care, grief, help, strength, song, joy, etc. I really liked that.
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August 18, 2015 at 7:43 pm
Don Skinner
At least one congregation I know of gives congregants teardrop-shaped pieces of paper. They can write about their water and then the teardrops are posted on a bulletin board. That way those who are interested in knowing more can read the board. I love knowing more about peoples’ water than what can be shared as they pour. Most people, once they are reminded to be thoughtful about this, write very heartfelt messages that add to community and that minimize class differences.
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August 19, 2015 at 7:35 pm
dannie_lynn
I have only had the opportunity to participate in this once. We did get up to an open mic and say why are water was important to us. Sometimes it did sound a little like “what I did on my summer vacation” but that was not my biggest impression. I heard wonderful things about why the water or place was important to them- family tradition, gratitude for nature etc. I brought tap water from my home and talked about how I felt safe in the home for the first time in years. I felt affirmed by nodding heads and smiles in the congregation. Also, though I might of felt a tinge of jealousy here and there, I appreciated not the places but the emotion and memoires. I will never go to Thailand or Peru or even Alaska. But I focused on the similarities and not the differences. I am a “poor” (financially) UU, but I felt very included and moved by this ceremony. This was in fact, one of the times I have felt the most included. Glad it worked for you–I hope you make it to another Water Ceremony soon. –AZM
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August 21, 2015 at 2:51 pm
Amy Zucker Morgenstern
Lots of lovely suggestions here–thanks!
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September 12, 2015 at 9:20 am
» Lifting Water Communion above Privilege and Trivia UU Class Conversations
[…] is the minister at the Unitarian Universalist Church of Palo Alto and author of the blog Sermon in Stones, which she began in 2010. In her posts, she explores matters of religion (theology, ecclesiology, […]
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September 13, 2015 at 4:20 pm
Water Ingathering at First Parish | Awake & Witness
[…] general denominational history here and about some of the more complicated aspects of it here or here – how long it can take for everyone to participate, how sometimes it can seem like a game of […]
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August 18, 2016 at 7:33 am
Lori Palmer Kane
We began a tradition of sterilizing some of the water and filling small glass vial necklaces. They are available at the water ceremony and throughout the year for anyone who is experiencing a challenge and would like a tangible symbol of the support of their congregation.
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August 18, 2016 at 9:41 pm
Amy Zucker Morgenstern
How lovely!
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August 18, 2016 at 9:18 am
Dale Husband
I do not agree that the water communion should be censored to not talk about summer vacations. Just because you went on a vacation and someone else did not does not make you superior to the other person. But even someone who does not travel can still pour water into the church’s bowl and then say, “This water comes from the restaurant where I work every day to provide for my family” or “This water comes from the creek outside the church, one of the most peaceful and beautiful places I know” or even “This water came from rain that was falling outside my home, which makes me think about how we all receive rain from nature.” We can have dignity with any story if we just listen.
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August 18, 2016 at 9:41 pm
Amy Zucker Morgenstern
I agree that all these stories have dignity and I love your examples. One of the things I am aware of as I shape a ritual is that people tend to follow each others’ example. If vacation sites dominate the sharing, then newcomers and others think, “I’m supposed to share about my vacation sites.” If more of the sharing focuses on workplaces, beautiful places, homes, families, then those who want to share in one of those ways will be emboldened to do so. It’s a matter of balance and correcting an imbalance, since by many reports (and my own experience) Water Communion sharing is heavily tilted against the examples you give.
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August 19, 2016 at 12:19 am
Further thoughts on Water Communion (timing) | Sermons in Stones
[…] I shared in a 2013 post, the Unitarian Universalist ritual of Water Communion can be more than a recitation of where people […]
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September 5, 2016 at 12:54 pm
elfkat
Reblogged this on Adventures and Musings of an Arch Druidess.
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September 8, 2019 at 3:39 am
David Sanguinetti
Love the reflections and all the blog responses! Ours in Vermont, like many of the others, has evolved into the “what I did over the summer”. My hope is to bring it back to the deeper spiritual connection this Sunday. I especially love the idea to use it as a blessing for those who are dying. Many thanks to all!
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September 12, 2019 at 6:08 am
Amy Zucker Morgenstern
How did it go?
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